People You Meet on a Video Call

They Put the “Mute” in Telecommute

Disclaimer: I wrote this back when Covid was in full swing.

The Irritating Interruptor

OK, so it’s not entirely their fault shitty WiFi makes it harder to take turns, but they were cutting people off even before Covid interrupted our lives. Now, they have an excuse. And the worst part? They only interrupt you so they can repeat exactly what you just said. That, or they insist on turning everything into a cringe-worthy joke they inevitably stole from The Office (which they just started watching for the first time. Ugh, they’re the worst). The only thing keeping you from laying into them is the simple fact that happy hour is only a few minutes away…for everyone else. (You started a few hours ago, thanks to a coffee mug full of Merlot and a fake teabag.)

The Loud Chewer

We all know what it’s like to wake up late — you barely have time to throw on a real top, let alone make and eat a full breakfast, so we get sometimes you have no other choice than to chow down during a video call. This is exactly why the makers of Zoom created “Mute” and “Turn Off Video,” so why not use them? There’s no quicker way to suss out who has misophonia¹ than to eat half-soggy cereal during your morning call while unmuted. We all…